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Computer Class
By Kazz Falcon

I was so excited about computer class
I haven’t done it in a few years
I proudly showed up for class
No one was around
I was the ONLY student
She made an appearance
“You need to learn on your own by the computer.”
Say what?
I can’t learn that way
I need a teacher to help me
I really need the book
It will help me to get through class easier
I got stuck a few times
I was frustrated and mad
It took a long time to solve the problem
Yet, no one was around to help me
I was all alone
I couldn’t get any work done
I was disappointed
I gave up the computer class

Homeless Roots
By Kazz Falcon

I really want to take the computer class again
The last class was a disaster
I took the subway to the shelter
I walked in the building
I mentioned to the guy I want to take the class
He forgot that I was there before
I lived there for six months in 2002
The moment I served my time, I didn’t want to go back
Not even for the computer class
In a way, I crawled back on my knees
Once again, I was back for the class
I should have continue the class after I left
But I didn’t
I want to get as far away from them possible
The moment you leave, no one wants to go back
I didn’t like the shelter
I was so grateful that they helped me
I have to start from the beginning AGAIN
I may have forgotten some stuff by now
I returned to the homeless roots

Suicide Guilt
By Kazz Falcon

My good friend killed himself
He had some trouble
Things wasn’t going his way
He had a hard time finding a job
He just lost his place
He had nobody to count on
I felt so guilty
I should have been there for him
I was too wrapped up with my own life
I hardly had any time for him
He comes and goes at my place
I could have stop him
I know I could
I was his only hope
I wasn’t there for him
I let him down
I won’t forgive myself
He whispered in my ear
It was that time to end it
It deafened my ears
I didn’t want to hear it
I took a long walk
I denied the suicide threat
I didn’t want to be there when he killed himself
I can’t handle the suicide
I heard a shot in the house
I ran as fast I could to the house
I was too late
I wished I did something to save him
He left the letter in my bed

Gay Marriage
By Kazz Falcon

That’s what I really want
The relationship was strong enough
Our love was solid as a rock
We were committed to each other
We were ready to take the next step
Marriage was on the horizon
It’s about that time
We were secure in the relationship
Something wasn’t that right
We can’t get marriage
We were a gay couple
We were truly in love
We want equal rights
Then, we will have the freedom
Why do we want a marriage license?
We had love and commitment
That’s good enough reason to get marry

War Protest
By Kazz Falcon

Hell, no
We won’t fight!
We don’t believe in it
It will cost more pain
Innocense people will be kill
Killing was never right
It was too painful
The families suffers too
We united in peace, not war
We must stop the war
War wasn’t worth the time or the pain
War costs millions of dollars
Helping the world is helping ourselves
War was not a solution
It’s an added problem for everyone
When will the war stops?
We already have enough hate in the world
Let’s work toward a society we can be proud of
The future generations will be proud of us
We desired for a better world
The protest gives us a cause
We were sick and tired of the bloodbath
War doesn’t do us any good
When it’s called for, don’t avoid the war protest

Sleepless Nights
By Kazz Falcon

What have I done?
I wasn’t able to get enough sleep
The guilt was eating me inside
I thought it was the right thing to do at the time
I let myself down
I let the baby down
I shouldn’t have done what I did
I may have kill the baby
I have no ideal if someone find him
Damn, I felt so ashamed
I could have drop him off at the local hospital
No questions ask
I wasn’t even thinking straight
I regretted of having a baby
It was an one night stand
I put a life at stake in the dumpster
He may be raise in an orphanage
Perhaps, a nice family may adopt him
I will never see him again
I supposed to take care of him
It was the motherly thing to do
I can’t get him back
I gave up my rights
I threw my baby in the trash
I cried about every night
I wished I had him in my arms again
He needs his mommy
May God take care of him
I need to take some pills
I must stop having sleepless nights

Dumpster Baby
By Kazz Falcon

I won't reveal who I am
I couldn't
The police will arrest me for child endangerment
But I can give you many reasons
I can't give the baby a life it's deserves
My parents don't know I was pregnant
They don't believe in premartial sex
I went against their beliefs
They will be disappointed in their little girl
I told my boyfriend that I was pregnant
He ran out on me - that  b a s t a r d
He told me that he wanted a kid
One day, I came home from work
All his things was missing
He didn't even left a Dear John letter
I couldn't believed that he will hurt us like that
I thought we were perfect together
I was left with nothing
All I had was a bun in the oven
Nine monthes later, I went to the alley
I found a spot to have the baby
It was an quite dark alley
No one suspects a thing
I had my baby behind the dumpster
The baby boy was innocense
I kissed him goodbye on the head
I was doing the right thing for him
I can't provide him a good life
I had nothing to give him
He became a dumpster baby

Father’s Right
By Kazz Falcon

My girlfriend accidentally got pregnant
She wasn't ready for motherhood
We always use condoms
I was capable of raising our kid
She doesn't felt like it was a good ideal
We had different views
She wants to finish college and get an career
I finished collage and had a good paying job
We can afford the baby
She doesn't see it that way at all
I won't abandon her during the pregnancy
We create a special baby
The baby deserves to live
She thought about ending the pregnancy
I was upset to hear that sad news
So much, I wanted that baby
She can't get of our baby
She has no right to get an abortion
I won't allow her
Abortion is wrong
If she does, she will be a murderer
She will be killing our love too
I have to stop her
She won't get rid of my baby
She has no right to end the pregnancy
I still had a legal connection
It was my father's rights

By Kazz Falcon
Youthful Queer
He was so much into the clubkids
His idol was Michael Alig
He found his identify early in life
He was gay and a clubkid at heart
He has an close knit of friends
His very own clubkids to party with
He was an natural and an original
People say he's unique
It was a nice way of saying he's a freak
He likes to march to the beat of electronic percussion machine
He wants to see who steals his heart
He's very special
He wasn't shy
He was outgoing and flamboyant
Is he the second coming of Michael Alig?
Don't get in his way
He will party your ass out like Angel
Someday, his true prince will come
They will live happily ever after
In clubland, where the clubkids rules

Only Time Will Tell
By Kazz Falcon

I just finished my first book two months ago
Would it be a success?
I really don’t know
Not enough people knew I was
The publisher took a chance on me
I hoped I was the readers’ liking
My art was so real that it brings something out
I was quite nervous
The book will come out early next year
I have never experience this before
Maybe, just maybe, the book was controversy
They will tend to stay away
Yet, it could bring more readers in
Everyone wants to know what’s the controvery about
I get good compliments
Sometimes, they were harsh
I considered that’s a good thing
Everyone was an critic about something
I won’t let it get to me
As long they likes the book, I will be okay
Who knows?
They may not understand my art
Therefore, they won’t buy it
They won’t waste a dime on me
That was fine too
Not everyone will be a success on their first try
Only time will tell

Baby Moses Law
By Kazz Falcon

I thought about leaving my baby in the dumpster
I wasn’t ready to be a mother yet
I was pregnant from a one night stand
It was the biggest mistake of my life
I don’t want to put my life on hold
I was seventeen year old
I dropped out of school
I ran away from home
I was ashamed of the situation
I learned there was a law
Baby Moses Law was the break I needed
I can leave the baby at a hospital, police, fire or EMS station
No one will say a thing; no questions ask
We can leave the baby at those places – day or night
We won’t go to jail either
I heard horror stories about the dumpster babies
I can’t put my child through that
It wasn’t fair to him
No one may not find him at all
I didn’t want to be charge with attempted murder
The dumpster was the wrong thing to do
I got the courage
I dropped the baby off at the police station
I sadly kissed him goodbye
I will never see him ever again
I was glad he was in safe hands
The police will take good care of him
I gave the baby a chance to grow and live
Thank God for Baby Moses Law

Hope For The Baby
By Kazz Falcon

It was time to put out the trash
The dumpster truck will be here in an hour
I had enough to gather up the trash
I took out the trash outside
I heard some noices coming from somewhere
I thought it was my imaginary
I walked closer to the dumpster
It was getting louder
I noticed it was coming from inside the dumpster
Man, we had rats again!
We needs a new landlord
I opened the dumpster
I saw small hands moving
I found it odd
I uncovered it
Dear Lord!
It was a baby
I can’t believed it
I grabbed the innocense baby
I felt terrible and angry
How could someone do such a thing?
The baby can’t defend himself
The terrible person put the baby’s life in danger
I called 911 on the cell phone
I hold the baby till the ambulance/police came
I prayed to God
They checked out the baby
They mentioned I found him in the nick of time
I praised God
There was hope for the baby

The Innocense Baby’s Death
By Kazz Falcon

My friends and I was going home from the clubs
We took a short cut through the alley
We came across something odd
We saw a kitten playing with a newly pacifier
We wondered where it came from
We walked closer to the playful kitten
We were shocked
Someone left a baby in the alley
We noticed the baby wasn’t breathing
Dear Lord!
We feared for the worst
The baby might be dead
Thank God the hospital was close by
We took the baby to the E/R
We anxiously waited in the waiting room
The police took our information
The doctors came out with the news
The baby didn’t make it
He was dead for a few hours
We felt guilty and cried
We didn’t find the baby on time
The baby will never see the light of day
We went home with the kitten
We didn’t know the name of the baby
We named the kitten after the baby - Hope
Hope was the pefect name for both of them
There was some hope for abandon babies

Secret Code
By Kazz Falcon

The secret code saved my life
Last week, I walked home from school
Of course, I was alone
My parents couldn’t pick me up
They were working at that time
I was minding my own business
This one guy drove up beside me
I didn’t pay any attention to him
He kept on trying to get my attention
He mentioned he was lost
I explained an adult can help him
He fed me another line
“Have you seen my lost dog?”
I wouldn’t answer him
He confessed that my parents told him to pick me up
I still didn’t trust him
I know better than that
I asked, “What’s the code?”
He was dumbstruck
He claimed there wasn’t time for the code
He opened up the passenger’s door
I screamed very loud
He saw someone running up
He zoomed off in his car
I explained to the stranger that he was up to no good
He called the police on his cell phone
The police arrived for the statement
I told them the same story
They asked the stranger some questions
Thankfully, he gave them his license plate
The police took me straight home
The police was glad I had a secret code

My Whole Life
By Kazz Falcon

My whole life was a lie
I was so freaking angry
The news hit me like a ton of bricks
I had a hard time dealing with it
How could it be?
I felt like I wasn’t a part of the family
Yet, they kept this horrible secret
I can’t forgive them at all
I don’t know who I was any more
I can’t go on like this
I have to search for my real mom
The “parents” claimed I was their son
I don’t believe that crap
They don’t care a damn about me
I want my real mommy in my life
She supposed to be there for me
She supposed to love me
She supposed to take care of me
She supposed to support me
She supposed to…
Just like the family that raised me
I realized I don’t need my real mother at all
She doesn’t want any part of me
I don’t give a damn about her
I never want to know the reason why
My parents were good enough for me
They still love me as their own
I know who I was
I was a part of a real family
I was so loved all my whole life

Quick Money
By Kazz Falcon

My real job doesn’t pay me that much
I had a baby to support
I decided to sell drugs
I already had an supplier from long time ago
I kept the past from my girlfriend
I fell in love with her
I gave up the drug lifestyle for her
Now, things wasn’t that smoothly
My girlfriend hounds me for money
I can’t depend on my real job
The baby costs a lot
She offered to get an job
I flat out refused
No girlfriend of mine will work
She has to take care of our baby
It was up to me to support them
My supplier was happy I was back
I was one of the best drug dealers in town
I was in big money once again
It felt so good to have the quick money

Little Boy’s Justice
By Kazz Falcon

Well, I had an sad story
I was going home with my kids
There was an heated argument across the street
My little boy ran ahead of us
The gun fire broke out
Bullets went flying everywhere
My son was calling out for me
He was hit in the body
I crawled to him, protecting the other kids too
He was heavily bleeding
We ran inside the house
I tried to save him, but it was too late
We cried that he was gone
I thought I will never lost a child at an early age
He was 8 years old
He was bright, fun and full of sunshine
It still broke my heart to this day
The killers got away
The police haven’t find them yet
Please, pretty please
Here is one thing I want the most
I want to avenge his death
Let’s bring the little boy’s justice

Where Did The Time Went?
By Kazz Falcon

I wondered about that all the time
I couldn’t believe time went so fast
I was 85 year old
I can remember I was 21 yesterday
I was youthful and creative
I was full of life
I had wonderful “friends” throughout the decades
Life wasn’t the same anymore
I kept to myself
I felt like time passed me up
I was left behind
I wasn’t part of life or time
I wasted valuable time
I regretted I didn’t use time wisely
I partied a lot with “friends”
I took any kind of drugs
I missed opportunities of lifetimes
I wished I had that time again
I will use time different
But it was too damn late
I was grouchy, old and useless
You don’t want to end up like me
I was sad and lonely
I didn’t accomplish a damn thing
Whenever you use time, make it counts
Where did all the time went?

Are We Still Close?
By Kazz Falcon

I felt like we weren’t close anymore
We used to do everything together
We shopped, go to the movies, hang out and so forth
These past few months, something happened to us
We don’t crossed paths
We don’t talk either
Did I do something wrong?
Are you mad at me about something?
Please tell me
I hoped I wasn’t on your bad side
It was tearing me apart
I lost a good friend
I missed the closeness we once had
We had wonderful fun times
Out of the blue, he called me
He was curious about something
He wondered what happened to me
Was everything all right with me?
Did I find a new boyfriend?
Was I mad at him?
Damn, it was the same thoughts I had about him
We just realized we were being foolish
We laughed it off
We were doing our own thing
We didn’t drift apart at all
Life happened for us
We were still close

Heavens Above
By Kazz Falcon

I wondered where I go after death
Will God still accept me?
I was really a nice person
Yes, I had some flaws
I wasn’t that perfect
I hardly go to church
I hardly read the bible
I hardly pray to God
Church doesn’t interest me
I heard the same service thousands of times
I knew I was still a Christian
Jesus Christ was always with me
He guides me through thick and thin
I continued to love God with all my heart
He fulfilled my life with happiness and blessings
I was happy to have him in my life
Some religions felt something was holding me back
They claimed I wouldn’t walk through the heavenly gates
They mentioned I must change my ways
I won’t be in the book of life
I don’t believed that nonsense
John 3:16 means WHOSOEVER who believes
After all, God loves this gay Christian
I will go to the heavens above

John 3:16
By Kazz Falcon

“For God so loved the world,
that he gave his only begotten Son,
that whosoever believeth in him should not perish,
but have everlasting life.”
That verse really sums it up
Whosoever believeth
Millions of people believed in God
They will go to Heaven
Because they believed in him
Yet, some religions believed otherwise
They felt like the homosexuals won’t go
The gays were all SINNERS
They won’t be allow in heaven
Where does that say in the bible?
I couldn’t find it anywhere
I wondered about something
Did man write the bible?
If that was the case, then God’s words wasn’t true
Some verses were hypocritical
Whosoever believeth
Whosoever believeth in him should not perish
Hmm, whosoever was the key
Yet, I believed in God AND I am gay
John 3:16 doesn’t refer to one certain group
It doesn’t say Muslims, gays, straights, black, latinos, Baptist and etc
Whosoever means ANYONE
In God’s eyes, I was a part of whosoever in John 3:16

Another Book
By Kazz Falcon

I recently died from a heart attack at age 27
I appeared in front of God
I feared for my life
I was a sinful creature
Yet, I couldn’t escape the hurtful truth
My life was recorded in his fact book
He knew everything about everyone
He knew my every pain, worry, fear and tears I had cried
What have I done?
I was a fool to pass up Jesus Christ
I could have invite him in my life
I rejected his love and saving grace
I was too busy living a sinful life
I was occupy in the world
Sometimes, the world turns a blind eye
I didn’t see the living truth
My fear became a reality
My name wasn’t in the book of life
I was cast into the lake of fire
I was doomed to eternal destruction
I was forever in perdition, thanks to another book

Lamb’s Book
By Kazz Falcon

Jesus Christ was the first name in the book
As it written, many others will be after him
God knows who will be in the book
On earth, we really don’t know
When we died, we will find out
God will open the book
Your name will appeared
Only if Jesus Christ saved you from your sins
Hopefully, my name is in the book too
We belongs to him FOREVER
We will live with him
He made houses for us to live
We won’t be in a cruel hateful place
There won’t be sickness, crying, suffering, pain or death
God takes all the troubles from us
Heaven is a wonderful place
Sin can never enter heaven
God won’t allow sin in Heaven
Sin belongs in the world
In heaven, we don’t have to deal with sin
We are free from sin
Don’t you want your name in the lamb’s book?

Life Or Death
By Kazz Falcon

We all have a life
We all know life can end in death
We can’t control death on earth
It was impossible
Only God knows when we die
He gave us the life
We can do whatever we want
Death can be on our doorstep at any time
God could give us a second chance at life
We can’t escape death
Still, life or death is a struggle
We all want to live forever on earth
It wasn’t meant to be that way
We will go to heaven after we died
Now, we have a chance to live forever
Jesus Christ made it possible for us
We repented for our sins and asked for forgiveness
Jesus saved us from our sins
Some of us face death in heaven
How’s that possible?
Not everyone was saved
They choose death over life in heaven
God send them to the lake of fire
What do you prefer – Life or Death?

Is God A Killer?
By Kazz Falcon

Some people thought so
He wasn’t a real God
He could never send people to hell
It wasn’t his nature
He was a sweet loving God
God sent his begotten son to earth
Jesus wants to save us from our sins
Isn’t that special?
Jesus was a gift from God
We have a choice
We can either accept him or reject him
Yet, they continued to believe God is a killer
Really, he wasn’t
God wasn’t forcing us to hell
He gave us Jesus Christ
He was allowing us to go
All along, it was our choice

That Damn Kid
By Kazz Falcon

I wished I didn’t had a 5 year old son
He took my freedom away
I couldn’t do the things I want to do
He was a huge burden for me
I don’t want him any more
His damn father wasn’t around either
He left before he was born
I was left holding the responsibilities
I can’t stand that twerp
He wasn’t a joy
He was a living nightmare
I need to get away from him
I palmed him off to some neighbors every weekend
I love partying with friends
I missed the fun times with them
I was such a fool to have him
Why did I bother?
Never again, I won’t have another baby
He was in his room most of the time
That was my only time for peace and quite
I want nothing to do with him
I blamed him for ruining my life
I don’t love him
I had so much anger
I screamed at him all the time
He holds me back from my life
I took the anger toward that damn kid

Real Mother’s Letter
By Kazz Falcon

My teenager kid always knew she was adopted
I loved her since she was an infant
I didn’t want our relationship to change
Our love was always strong
She doesn’t want to meet her real mom
There was no need
Recently, I received a letter from her mother
I felt angry and betrayed
How could she find her daughter?
The lawyer promised she would never know our address
He couldn’t have told her
She must got our address somewhere else
I dreaded to tell my daughter
My hubby thought it was a good thing to tell her
I was against it
She gave up her rights long time ago
She was never a mother to begin with
We were the only parents she ever known
My hubby finally persuaded me
I didn’t bring up the letter
I asked, “Do you ever want to see your real mom?”
She nodded her head, “No!”
I gave her the letter to read
She read it
She just didn’t care about her
She sent her a letter back
She wants her to leave her alone forever
I was glad for her and for us
She will always be my little girl
I ripped up the real mother’s letter

Mommy’s Dying
By Kazz Falcon

I recently learned that mommy’s dying
My daddy told me the sad news
She has cancer
She was in her final stages
I was sad and heartbroken
I didn’t want her to leave daddy and me
We loved her so much
We really needs her
I don’t see a life without her
She was our life
She took good care of us
We will miss her deeply
Life wouldn’t be the same
She mentioned I was in good hands
Daddy will take care of everything
I cried in her arms
It wasn’t fair for us
This 5 year old really needs a mommy
She was my rock
Daddy comforted me
He promised me that she would always be in my heart
She will look out for me from the heavens
She was my guardian angel
I felt so much better
I hugged her one last time
She died in daddy’s arms
It was a new beginning for daddy and me

Act Of Kindness
By Kazz Falcon

I thought about dropping out of collage
I couldn’t afford my education any longer
I had a year left
I was so close
I didn’t want to put it off
I was doing quite well
My parents didn’t have that much money
I couldn’t ask them for help
My part time job didn’t pay a lot
I hate begging for handouts
It was beneath me
Out of the blue, a stranger offered me to pay
At first, I refused
I can’t pay him back
I turned the money down
I will have to get the money some other way
He offered the money again
I wondered what’s the catch
He mentioned that he was in the same spot few years ago
He knew what I was going through
An old lady paid for his collage classes
He was glad to help me
After all, God will pay him back for the act of kindness

Mickey Kidnapped
By Kazz Falcon

I was at street fair concert with my baby son
I had so much fun
Even some friends was there
I wasn’t alone
Something smells
It was time to change the diaper
I put down my cup next to the neighbor
I changed my son’s diaper
He was freshly clean
I went back to listen to the concert
I drank my coke
I became dizzy
I didn’t know what was happening.
It wasn’t that hot
A woman demanded my baby
I refused
She grabbed the baby out of my hands
She ran away with my son
I was helpless, even my son was helpless
It was too late to call for help
I passed out on the floor
Moments later, a friend splashed water on my face
I screamed out for my son
He was missing
My friends mentioned they arrested her
She tried to kidnap him
She slipped a mickey in the drink
Few people was suspicious of her
She acted strangely
Thank God my friends were around
I wouldn’t know what I would do without them
They saved my son’s life
I will never leave my drink unattended again
I learned my lesson the hard way

Copyright 2005 Kazz Falcon

I have the spirit of an alien.
I need to find my own kind.
I must shed off the dreadful human skin.
It is very uncomfortable.