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By Kazz Falcon

The first time I saw him, I became infatuated with him
From that moment on, I wanted him to be mine
He was forever my valentine
He doesn’t know I exist
I followed him everywhere from afar
I loved him since I saw his beautiful eyes at the bar
Isn’t that a little sickening bizarre?
It really isn’t, I admired him very much
There wasn’t anything wrong
I wanted him for so long
I didn’t have the nerves to introduce myself
He was too good looking; I wasn’t his type
Damn!  Why doesn’t he look at me?
I was much better for him than anybody else
No man could love me as I could
Since he doesn’t pay that much attention to me,
I would be on his tail
He still hasn’t reply to all my mail
I wondered why
He wasn’t that shy
He dances with the other men in public
He can’t do that anymore
He’s mine, mine, and forever mine
That does it! I would follow him everywhere

The Guilty One
By Kazz Falcon

I confessed I commit a crime
What happened to love takes time?
The hatred I had for my ex lover
From heaven to hell, it really moved the earth
The pain cried from within
Why couldn’t he love me even more?
He shouldn’t left me for another man
Caring for him, loving him was such a good plan
He tossed my feelings into the lake
He passionately hurt me
He claimed he has fallen out of love
It was a shame; he didn’t give our love a second chance
God, I can’t believe it
He gave up on our love; it angered me a lot
So much, I want to do something drastic
His new lover would die alone in this world
I sought our for my revenge
I brought a gun to end their love
I ought to listen to my inner being
But the anger controlled the deadly situation
May God help them both
At the end, I pulled out a gun
He died I his new lover’s arm

Ragu Religion
By Kazz Falcon

I found God again
I could smoke pot in his honor
I should play the drums
I would be high as God in the heavens
Now, I have a drug dealer
I served God by doing drugs
The federal officers can’t close them down
The law was on their side
Everyone would show up for Sunday morning
 I worshiped God through the drugs
Why can’t every religion be like that?
There won’t be any fighting among the Christians
I must see things clearly
I have the power of God in the drugs
Therefore, I should be more open minded
I never thought a drug could be so religion
It gave “God is my drug” new meaning
I ought to love God even more
I brought so much drugs to get high on God
I fought to be a Christian through the drugs
I sought out the Ragu Religion

The Religion Drug
By Kazz Falcon

I ran out of drugs for church
I took a drive to my drug dealer
I brought a good amount  
It would last me for weeks; God would be pleased
I went over to the church at night
I didn’t make it all the way
The police stopped me on the freeway
I went a little to fast, I was running late
I didn’t want to miss church
They noticed something smelt funny
I want so badly to hop like a bunny
They ordered me out of the car
They found the drugs in my front pocket
I tried to explain that I do drugs for God
I cried when they handcuffed me
It fried me that they didn’t believe the truth
I mentioned the law was on my side
They just laughed out loud
For doing drugs, I wasn’t that bright
I felt that going to jail wasn’t right
I wondered what happened to the power of the light
It was time to call it a night

Looking At Myself
By Kazz Falcon

The mirror doesn’t lie
I took a good look at myself
I didn’t like what I see
I became grossly ugly over the years
I forgot how it started
I felt like I was forever the ugly duckling
I was so insecure about my looks
I was uncomfortable, my looks wasn’t all that
I tried to hide my looks
I cried that I was ugly
The mirror was my sworn enemy
I wore long sleeve shirts
I even don’t show my legs
I covered up every part of my body
I was much safe in clothes
I could go anywhere; no one would look at me
I can’t swim, but I know how to swim
I wouldn’t dare to go swimming in public
Everyone would know I was pretty ugly
I would rather have fun in the bathtub
I was much safer there than the swimming pool
I must wear long sleeve shirts at all times
I looked in the mirror again
Nothing changed - I was still ugly
No matter what, the mirror doesn’t lie

Feeling Stupid
By Kazz Falcon

I was in class this morning, feeling stupid
The assignment was extremely hard
I was stuck against the wall
I had no such luck, I couldn’t play ball
I was a sitting duck; I was about to fall
I tried it once more
I cried that I didn’t understand it
I fried that the teacher wasn’t around
I failed once more
It was frustrating for me
By then, my brain was working overtime
The assignment became a bigger headache
I forced myself to do it
I was less successful so many times
I gave up; I want to leave the class
The teacher wasn’t paying attention to me
It was useless to get help
I still couldn’t do it
I felt powerless in class
I fell down on my ass
I knew I couldn’t do it
I was a slow learner
I was feeling stupid

By Kazz Falcon

Couldn’t it be everything?
Couldn’t it be anything?
Couldn’t it be something?
Could it be nothing?
It must be everything I dream of
It must be anything I hope for
It must be something I really way
It must be nothing I care for
I shouldn’t want everything
I shouldn’t want anything
I shouldn’t want something
I should want nothing
My life was perfect the way it was
Then again, I haven’t had everything
I haven’t had anything
I haven’t had something
I have nothing

Freedom Again
By Kazz Falcon

I recently found a new place after two long months
I love the sound of it, my very own place again
It couldn’t come at a better time
I had enough of the damn shelter
There were so many rules; I didn’t have that much freedom
I didn’t get enough sleep; I woke up every day at 5:45 AM
Now, I could sleep in my own bed
I had so many sleepless nights; it was cold to sleep
I could relax more; it was about time too
I was happier once again; I had my freedom back
I could cook all types of food
Eating the food at the shelter wasn’t healthy
We mostly eat the same thing every few days
It wasn’t good for anybody, mostly chicken
I was sick of chicken; I never want to eat it again
I could watch my TV shows again
Will& Grace, soaps, Friends, The Simpsons and more
I hardly watch any TV there
They mostly watch sports or movies they rented
I could have a drink; they can’t hound me about AA meetings
They made me to go to AA about every day
Hello, I don’t have a drinking problem, I never did
I didn’t need to go, I was a control drinker
Thank God, I was finally out of the shelter
I would never go back, I had my freedom again

Damn! Not Again
By Kazz Falcon

I had money problems over two months
Living on my own again was much harder than I thought
I wanted to get a second job, but I can’t
My job takes up most of my time
By the time I get off the bus, it would be bedtime
I need to fix up my place in my lifetime
I can’t afford a bed, couch or TV
The rent was too high
I really love the neighborhood
It was worth the rent in West Hollywood
I didn’t want to pass up the apartment
It has a Mountain View, cable & Internet ready and more
I lived by the grocery store, bus lines, church and the clubs
What more do I want?
I was satisfied except for one big thing
My job was far away; it was two hours on the bus
I was always tired
I just wanted to relax on my day offs
A roommate sounds like a fabulous ideal
Like I said earlier, I don’t have time
I can’t interview anyone for my roommate
I prayed that being homeless again is not my fate
I was doing the best I could
I didn’t like the shelter at all
I didn’t get enough sleep
It made my life a living hell
I feared I would be homeless again
I believed I left too early, not enough money I saved

Rock Bottom
By Kazz Falcon

I felt like a fool, I drank my life away
I thought it was cool; it didn’t turn out to be that way
I had everything at my feet
The drinking was a huge defeat
Boy, I was wrong
I wasn’t that strong
I believed I could handle my drinking
It turned out that my money was shrinking
It burned me that I lost control of my life
I felt someone stab me with a knife
I lost everything, as the drinking got bad
It also cost me my wife, I was sad
For the fool I was, the bottle was my downfall
I couldn’t look at the truth; I was small
I truly love my drug - alcohol
Then again, it had me against the wall
My life continued downhill
I won’t completely stop till

Rehab Center
By Kazz Falcon

I had enough of my drinking
It wasn’t do anyone or me any good
I completely lost faith in everyone
I destroyed their trust
In their eyes, my friendship became a dust
They didn’t bother with it any longer
They kicked me out of their lives
I licked my wounds
I wasn’t successful kicking the habit on my own
I was tied down to my drinking
I cried that I failed me so many times
Doing it on my won wasn’t working
It fried me that I couldn’t stop
I tried my best
I had no one to turn to, not even my family
I looked into my soul of the heart
It took a beating as I searched for the answer
My outlook changed everything
The heart collapsed, my body aches
I couldn’t bared to keep on living that life
I wouldn’t dare to continued drinking
I promised I should seek help at a rehab center

By Kazz Falcon

I was attraction to this guy
He felt the same way
He was taken away by my love
I showered him with love and gifts
He has never met someone like me before
To my loving heart, he opened the door
My alcoholism couldn’t be ignore
He wanted to love me no matter what
I have been sober over four months
We were quite pleased with my success
So far, so good, my life wasn’t a mess
Not so fast, problems begun to creep up slowly in my life
Someone stabbed my lover with a knife
The doctors couldn’t save him; he quickly died
I felt the pain in my heart
It was a crushing blow
My mother recently passed away a short time ago
The boss laid me off; the business was slow
I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown
All those dreadful things made me to frown
I lost so many at once
I couldn’t deal with it
The pain wouldn’t go away
I wasn’t all that gay
All this time, I wanted a drink
Why now? I didn’t want to see a shrink
Nobody could help, me life was destroyed
Somebody knew I relapsed

Lost So Many
By Kazz Falcon

This past six months became too emotional for me
It seemed like when my life get better, it get worse
I couldn’t remain sober
 I finally relapsed
I should drink, but the pain was extremely hard
I wouldn’t be able to handle it alone
My life had fallen apart
With a knife, someone killed my sweetheart
My mom had a heart attack at the local mart
I lost my job; it wasn’t smart
My boss warned me that business would be slow
Across the nation, September 11 was a crushing blow
I could look for another job
My lover should be alive
It was my fault
It was my ideal that he work at night
The nighttime was an easy target for any homosexual
Then, there was my mother
We were so close; she loved my boyfriend a lot
She was like a second mom to him
His family disowned him at an early age
I really hate my life right now
Why do all good things must end?
I can’t go on, suicide is tempted
God, I need another drink,
I want to forget the pain and the troubles
I lost so many

Hate Crime
By Kazz Falcon

The weather was beautiful in the summertime
I decided to go grocery shopping at nighttime
It was extremely hot in the daytime
Without thinking, I took an alley shortcut
Some young men made their strut
I looked at one of their fabulous butt
They noticed it and called me a faggot slut
I flipped them off
I went on my merry way
It angered them; they weren’t that gay
As fast I could, I ran away
The hoodlums caught up with me
They taught me a lesson - Gay wasn’t cool
I know better, I wasn’t a fool
From a back pocket, he took out a tool
I feared for my life
Another one brought out a knife
I sought a way out of the mess
I thought long and hard about the deadly situation
I was in the corner; I fought for my dear life
Someone caught them beating up on me
He called 911
They fled with my wallet
We explained to the police what happened
They weren’t any help at all
They believed they robbed me for me wallet
All I can say, gay bashing is a hate crime

The Power Of Attorney
By Kazz Falcon

My lover doesn’t want to stop drinking
Even when I was homeless, he still drinks
I won’t let him to move in with me
I was truly fed up with his drinking and him
My friend gave me a brilliant ideal
Why not get power of attorney on his behalf?
He can’t say a damn thing
The power of attorney was my powerful sword
I must somehow let him to sign over his rights
Trust me, it won’t be easy
Then again, his drinking might be the key
That wouldn’t be hard
He could get so freaking drunk
He would sign his life away
After I get the power, he wouldn’t be so gay
He should get on his knees and pray
Fat chance!
God wouldn’t save him from me
I got to do what I got to do
Then the real power comes into play
I could ruin his life like he done mine
I wasn’t that type of a person
Instead, I would use the power of attorney

The Power
By Kazz Falcon

It was about time I got the power
I would take down the misery tower
He won’t ruin my life
He signed his life away
It made my day
It was time to send him on his way
We took a ride along the beach
For me, it would be useless to preach
He thought nothing of it
It was the two of us, having fun in the car
I was being quite about the whole thing
I looked at my engagement ring
It wasn’t real as our love
Both died long time ago during his drinking
I tried to love him, but it became too much
I cried that he doesn’t want to help himself
I can’t be there for him anymore
I pulled up in the driveway
I showed him the way
He went ballistic; he couldn’t believe it
He didn’t want to go
I brought up the power of attorney papers
He ought to know by now
His life was forever in my hands

By Kazz Falcon

Rest in Peace
From this world, his spirit was released
He died from being obese
His eating habit increased
His diet was too late; his weight didn’t decreased
From a heart attack, he became the deceased

A Lover’s Betrayal
By Kazz Falcon

He vowed revenge for betraying him
It was his own doing
I looked out for me
It was a personal gain
He doesn’t see it that way
He believed I tricked him to sign the papers
What else can I do?
The power of attorney was in our best interest
He doesn’t want to stop drinking
Due to his alcoholism, our love was shrinking
He did everything in his power to mess up our lives
Now, I have the power to fix our lives and maybe our love
He made excuses to stay out of rehab
He got a new job
They can wait for him
He lived with his family, he “moved” in with me
His AA meetings, he doesn’t take them serious
Hmm, the way I see it
They would be there when he finishes rehab
No big deal at all
He vowed I would pay for ruining his life
I wasn’t worry or afraid
His past was a powerful weapon to use against him
He hasn’t had a prayer in the world to fight me
He must look on the bright side
The rehab was a new beginning for him

Why Did He?
By Kazz Falcon

My lover forced me into rehab
That bastard! I don’t have a drinking problem
Wait till I get my hands on his sorry ass
He would regret for betraying me the way he did
The power of attorney should be invalid
He tricked me for signing my life away
I was never drunk in anyway
In court, he would have his day
Right now, I was stuck in rehab
God, I can’t stand this place
I don’t belong here
I need to call my family
They would get me out
I didn’t give him any doubts
He should know better
He lived with me over two years
My drinking was never out of control
Did I ever hit him?
Hell, no
Now, it tempted to hit him
He ruined my life on purpose
Thanks to him, I lost everything
He even cost my new job at Hilton
That bastard! He would get his some day
Sooner or later, I would have my way
I resented him for destroying my life
He would pay with a knife
Why did he?

Target: Matthew Shepard
By Kazz Falcon

I noticed a guy entered my favorite place
He was friendly and trustworthy
I figured he was harmless but there was one thing I hate
He was a homosexual
 I really despised them
Why did he have to come here instead?
There were other places to get a drink
If word gets out, the other faggots would show up
Then my favorite place would be their own
God, what a horrible thought
I can’t let it happen, I just can’t
I need to do something fast before it’s too late
It became my new purpose in life
It was fate
I can’t make a scene
Nobody would suspect a thing
So badly, I want to
Damn, I must be patience and wait for the right moment
Hey, that’s a great ideal
I could enlist my friend
He hates gays with a passion
I already got a sure fire plan in my mind
The thought of it wasn’t too kind
I could warm up to that faggot
He wouldn’t know what hit him
Somehow, I must gain his trust
Anyhow, that’s the key to Target: Matthew Shepard

By Kazz Falcon

I met two guys at a club
They were friendly
We begun talking about anything
They offered to buy me another drink
I declined
I was driving
Two drinks were enough for me
They mentioned they didn’t had a ride home
Out of the kindness of my heart, I would take them
They claimed a couple more drinks wouldn’t hurt
They lived close by
I stupidly agreed, I had a few more
The last one really hit me
I was blasted
Somehow, I made it to a car
I figured they could spend the night with me
They pulled up somewhere
I got out of the car
 I realized it wasn’t mine
I had no ideal of where I was
It was an open field
 I was by the fence
They taunted me for being gay
It was too late
 I couldn’t escape
They tied me up to the fence
I was badly beaten
 I was frightened
I pleaded with them to stop
I thought they were my friends
I ought to know, never trust strangers

Reunited With Family
By Kazz Falcon

I finally got back in touch with my family
I haven’t seen them in a few years
They didn’t want any part of me
I gave them hell throughout the years
My parents threw me out of the house
From doing drugs, I was being a louse
They were so disappointment in me
They raised me better than that
I just wanted to do my own thing
I was too wild for them; I partied every weekend
I come home late, some nights I didn’t show up
They were so sick of my drug use
In my early 30’s, I got tired of the abuse
The drugs was taking on toll
I finally realized they were right about the drugs
Then it sunk in my heart
I missed my mother’s hugs
It warms my heart
 I missed them so much
I turned over a new leaf
I burned for my family
 I want them back
I just got out of rehab a few days ago
Going back home was a wonderful feeling to have
They were pretty impressed with me
I was blessed to be alive and have them in my life again
They were blessed to finally met their grandson

Flesh & Blood
By Kazz Falcon

 My girlfriend wasn’t in the mood
I used drugs in front of the baby; she angrily stood
She lashed me out for being stupid
The baby was in extremely danger
I could accidentally give him some
Then the baby wouldn’t survive
Where would I be?
I probably be in jail for child endangerment
Anything bad could happen with a baby
She claimed I didn’t love them as much
I proclaimed they were my world
 I would do anything
“Including giving up the drugs?” she asked.
For a minute, I pondered my life without drugs
My life was stress free
 I was calmer
I had a pretty good job and an apartment
I was happier with my life
“Happy without us in your life?” she asked.
I just laughed, she was kidding
She put her foot down
I saw her sadly frown
She wasn’t playing around
The bell made a loud sound
I heard it loud and clear in my head
I can’t stand losing them
They were a major part of my life
I promised her I would give up the drugs
I flushed them down the toilet for my flesh & blood

Drug Baby
By Kazz Falcon

Hello, I was the worst mother ever
My doctor told me to stop using drugs - NEVER!
Please! My baby would be just fine
The drugs wouldn’t effect the baby in anyway
He warned me that the baby would be in grave danger - NO WAY!
Besides, I could stop anytime
He mentioned it ought to be a crime
Yeah, right!
He figured I wasn’t that bright
I just didn’t care
He tired his best to give me a scare
I cried out loud, I went into labor
It went over a day
I wasn’t that gay
The birth hurts like hell
I gave birth to a baby boy
Something was immediately wrong
Anything but that I feared
Nothing was further from the truth
I was ashamed of myself
I didn’t see my baby soon after the birth
I felt so much guilt in my life
I couldn’t believe it
The guilt was so strong
I never went to see the drug baby

Once Upon A Time
By Kazz Falcon

Once upon a time
I was a very nasty slime
It ought to be a crime
I like to rhyme
Before my bedtime,
I like to climb
Up a tree, it won’t cost me a dime
In the meantime,
I was a mime
In my lifetime
In the summertime
And springtime
Not the wintertime
I loved the warm weather in the daytime
This poem went overtime
It was time
To end it in my time
It was nighttime
Once upon a time

My Good Fortune
By Kazz Falcon

They threw me a loop
I couldn’t believe the scoop
In my pants, I almost pooped
There were so sure
We weren’t poor
It was my ideal to play the big money
For a cruise, I would take my honey
We were as gay as The Flintstones
Everyone congratulated us on the phone
Thank God! This wasn’t The Twilight Zone
First class to Hollywood, we flown
What the heck!
He handed my first check
From now on, our lives weren’t a major wreck

The Red Dragon
By Kazz Falcon
I was the most fearsome leader of the KKK
I ruled the South with an iron claw
I don't like the other kinds of people around here
The South don't take too kindly
The blacks, the Latinos, and the gays must not come
I want to get rid all of them from the South
Even I ran out some family members out of town
They were nigger loving bastards or some sort
Their kind wasn't welcome at all
We can't embrace them, except our own
If any white love them, they would be disown
I can't have that going on in the South
It wasn't right - not then, not now
The South should have won the civil war
We would have slavery for life
Thanks to Abe Lincoln, we lost some white power
It's up to the South to get all the power back
The North doesn't care about our country
With The South, the white power must rule at all cost
The federal flag was still above the USA flag
We mean business no matter what
No person can survive the alligator in the swamps
Everyone should be scare of the Red Dragon.

The Nigger
By Kazz Falcon

Hello, I’m a nigger
Most people in the South called me that
I’m really a black man
I just moved to the South, which caused a uproar
They didn’t like me moving into their territory
My grandpa was from the South, slavery and all
He didn’t have the freedom I do
My heritage was in the South
Grandpa work in the fields all day long
They work him like a dog - I had proof
It means so much of where we came from
We were sold into slavery by Africa for the white men
The only proof I had was the slavery necklace
All the times he was a slave, it was never take off
A few whites hated the blacks were slaves
They couldn’t do anything about it
Nothing has much changed since then
The blacks became free
 The whites became power hungry
Since they lost power, they remained hateful to us, niggers
The KKK is still spreading hate all over the South
Where is the brotherly love?
God isn’t hate; the flesh doesn’t like their kind
The white power wasn’t worth to have
We supposed to be free everywhere
They still warned the niggers by burning the cross

The Nigger’s Death
By Kazz Falcon

The fellow KKK members went on a Lynch Mob
A black man accuse my son of stealing from him
That was the final straw
The nigger had no proof of the crime
How could he stop so low?
Then again, I wouldn’t be so surprised
He dragged the white man down
I let him had it in front of the whole town
They witnessed his murderous death
I hope it scared the other niggers to get out
If not, we would continue to use the white power
On the city halls, we torched the bastard
He burned to death on the cross
He hasn’t met Jesus Christ till now
The white Christians must do it right
Staying in the South, the niggers wasn’t that bright
By now, they should saw the light
It could happen to them
The death put the other niggers on noticed
We won’t stop till they leave the South
Getting rid of them is our sole mission
The niggers won’t infect the South any longer
We should protect our turf
His death was a reminder how deadly we can be
I can’t wait till the REAL South come back
We will continued to say “Niggers, slaves,” not black

Burning Cross
By Kazz Falcon

I was sleeping in my bed with my wife
My two kids was safely in their beds
Something crashed through the window
It startled my family and me
The wife checked on the kids
I ran down the stairs
I found the threatening rock with slurs
I heard the gruesome sounds coming from the outside
It was disturbing; my family came down
I peaked through the window; it made us frown
A cross was burning, the KKK walked around it
Our stomachs turn inside and out
Their hatred was too much to take
They yelled, “”Go back where you come from.”
As I recalled, the white people brought us as slaves
Therefore, we belonged here and we are now free
Like MLK said, “Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"
Why can’t they take it with a grain of salt?
I won’t move my family out of town
No KKK can force us at all
The South was my home, ours for life
They can kick us down
It would make us stronger; I won’t frown

Copyright 2005 Kazz Falcon

I have the spirit of an alien.
I need to find my own kind.
I must shed off the dreadful human skin.
It is very uncomfortable.